Monday, January 25, 2010

Confusion


I've been catching up on a lot of reading, as of late, hence that's why I hardly posted. I was distracted by YoVille on Facebook, but now I got what I needed to get done there, I decided to read. Been reading some of the books I have on my shelf that I bought months ago. I bought them because I felt drawn to them, others, that were recommended for me to read. A lot of the subject matter was Green Witchery. No, not just about being environmentally conscious (which is a great thing to be) but about growing plants and living with nature. Growing your own plants/herbs/flowers. A few of these books were heavily encouraged (see, pushed on) by someone who is no longer a friend. This is what she was interested in. She tried to get me to follow what she was into. I read these books, which were good, but when it comes to growing things, I do not have a green thumb, it's more a beige thumb. Everything I try to grow, ends up dying within a few weeks. Ok, I did manage to successfully grow catgrass last year, but that was about it. Even if I go to a nursery to buy plants, they die in a matter of weeks, even when I do what they told me to do to keep them living.

I've also been reading about Hedgewitchery, something that I find interesting. But again, I'm getting discouraged, my meditations are all wonky, as of late. I can't seem to concentrate on keeping my mind quiet. I had this problem when starting with meditations last year, but over came them back in the summer. Now, I'm back to square one. Does this happen to you as well?? I miss the communion I was having with my guides in the Otherworld. I never thought I would be able to go there, but I had just started when my mind wouldn't stop chatting. Argh!! It's frustrating!! Was I ready to travel there??

Another topic I've been reading about is solitary witchcraft. There are a lot of books out there and the newest one I got last week was by Marion Green. I read it, thought it was a good book, there were some things in it that sounded interesting. It's a sort of "beginner" book if you're new to the craft, but it also lets the adept see things in a new light. I read it through once & now I'm going through it again, as suggested, and reading the suggested reading. The only thing is: I can't find any books by Dion Fortune. I know they are suggested reading, but her books come up a lot when I'm reading. I want to see why they are so special.

I got confused when reading this book, it opened up a vault of info about different paths, healing, divination, hedgewitchery, joining a coven. These are things I have been trying to decide what to do. I know I should feel drawn to something, but I'm not sure which path. Divination is the closest, as I have been reading the Tarot for 18 yrs now. I am trying Runes, but they are hard!!! I know this is something I have to decide for myself, but it's like having to choose between chocolate, great sex and Robert Pattinson (yes, I have a thing for him), can't I have it all?? Oy Vey!!

3 comments:

Celia (Head Witch of the Hollow) said...

I've read Marion's book...and many years ago I read all of Fortune's books...to be honest...now they seem very dated...so I think they would be a disappointment to you.
She wrote a lot of fantasy/witchy/ceremonial type novels which are just a scream...very "hammy"...but some of her metaphysical books weren't bad...but a bit heavy going!
(I don't know why everyone recommends her!)

How are you doing my girl?
I'm not blogging much now either...I'm trying to sort my herb business out...and it takes up most of my time...so I know how you feel...

I bet you have got green thumbs...under the beige...everything wants to grow...maybe you got put off because of the pressure on you...
(Rabbits eat loads of my stuff!)

Nice to see you about again...who's Robert Pattison?
And I'd have the chocolate...it lasts longer!

Rowan Silverstar said...

I think ppl recommend Fortune because she had a lot of things hidden in her writings?? I don't know.

I think I may put a lot of pressure on myself to grow things, but when my mums dies a week after I got them, I looked at my thumbs and theywere defintely beige...dead plant beige...Lol!!

Robert Pattinson played Edward Cullen in the Twilight Saga. I think he's hot for a youngling.

Rue said...

It's a toss up between the sex and the chocolate... Maybe the sex, because it burns calories instead of putting them on my hips - lol!

Don't stress yourself about all your choices! Number one - never do anything because someone says "you should." Do what interests YOU.

Number two - you can do everything if you want. Just one thing at a time. So just today do Runes. And tomorrow, play with your herbs or oils. It's supposed to make you feel connected, not overwhelmed.

Lastly, as far as meditation goes, we all fall off the wagon. Sometimes my mind just won't shut up. So, when I just can't do it on my own for some reason, I use a guided meditation cd. It takes the pressure off myself, and then after a few listens, I'm back to doing it on my own again.

Best wishes on your journey. I know you will be fine. Just give yourself a break!

Many, many hugs to you!

PS - I have quite a few cd's I don't listen to anymore, so if you are interested in guided meditation, let me know and I'll pop a couple in the mail to you. You can email me at: rueandhyssop(at)gmail(dot)com.

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